HSP and the Art of Not Giving a F*ck
Welcome Substack readers new and old. ✨
Not giving a f*ck is definitely NOT the mantra of the HSP. If anything, Highly Sensitive People give way too many f*cks for anyone to stay reasonably sane or healthy.
Now, don’t fret: I’m not going to tell you to stop worrying. That’s not helpful advice; it’s like when someone says to “calm down”.
Now, while HSPs who are talented, motivated and enjoy both the benefits & rigors of working freelance, this mode of work can indeed be freeing — but it doesn’t come without problems.
You see, what I’ve learned, after almost 30 years of doing every type of creative work you can imagine in almost every model — from freelancing from home to working in a hybrid fashion to working full-time in an office every day — is that, no matter how, when, or where you work, there are going to be jerks.
Here are the various types of jerks you’ll deal with as a freelancer:
People who continuously try to get more for less (I’ll write a post about “scope creep” soon).
People who try to lowball you on rates.
People who don’t know how to provide feedback in a professional or constructive way.
People who “forget” to pay you.
People who ghost you or pretend that they didn’t get your invoice or inquiry.
People who come back months later and want you to “fix” something or add something new to their article or case study (for no extra money).
You get the drift. And, the thing is I always gave a f*ck and I still do — to some extent. But, I now fully realize that Highly Sensitive People tend to be more diligent and exacting than the average person. These are good characteristics of course - until we are left feeling drained, disappointed, and resentful.
Push Back
As a freelance writer running my own business, I had to learn how to push back and use my voice in a confident and professional way. Therapy, meds, taking regular breaks and daily exercise in addition to hard work help me to stay centered and calm but the stress and anxiety of dealing with difficult clients certainly added up at times.
As freelancers, our aim is to keep our best clients and ditch the others. But, finding clients who pay well, provide interesting work, are lovely to deal with, and communicate effectively aren’t always readily available.
As you learn to find your voice and confidence and gain traction in the industry, you’ll be able to be more selective in the work that you take on and how to better spot red flags when speaking to clients.
You won’t necessarily stop giving a f*ck but you’ll be more selective about how and when those f*cks are given.
Niche Freelance Opportunities & Shares:
Disclaimer: I vet these opportunities before sharing but you are responsible for doing your own due diligence.
Meeting and Events Planner (contract)
Social Content Creator B2B (freelance)
Until next time - stay real, HSP.
Lisa